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tv   The Daily Show With Jon Stewart  Comedy Central  August 20, 2013 7:25pm-7:56pm PDT

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from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with jon stewart. [ cheers and applause ] >> john: welcome to the daily show. my name is john oliver. jon stewart still not here in a huge deal. he's actually being taken over by amazon ceo jeff bezos. such a shame. jon stewart proudly owned himself for 50 years. our guest tonight from the new film "paranoia" liam hemsworth is here. [ cheers and applause ] but we start tonight with a subject everybody loves: taxes. who in america doesn't grow up
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excitedly leaving a box of your old receipts at the foot of your bed on april 15 eve hoping that if you've been good an accountant from the north pole will show up on his magic sleigh and reward you with a surprisingly large invoice from the government? but did you know that our tax system is somehow not universally beloved? >> we need to overhaul our tax code. >> the tax code is broken. it's not fair. >> it is inefficient. our tax code is one of the worst in the world. >> simplify the tax code. we need to change our tax code. >> john: whoa, watch your mouth. you can't just talk to codes like that. they're very sensitive. this is exactly the kind of criticism that drove the morse code to suicide. for all of you morse code fans. yes, look, we all think the tax code needs pruning every now and again. that is why we do it, i imagine,
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every three to five years. >> our tax code hasn't been reformed since 1986. that's 27 years. >> wow. to put that in perspective, the tax reform act of 1986 happened the same year that this was happening. >> i'm cow boy george. and i'm boy george. pick your pick. choose your pick. be there, by george. john: we haven't addressed this fundamental economic issue in any significant way since the way when boy george could guest star on the a-team. by the way you couldn't get any more 1980s than that if a rubic's cube made love to a nintendo entertainment system and gave birth to a v.h.s. copy of flash dance then that copy of flash dance was raised by three men: right? while we haven't reformed the
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tax code since 1986 we've certainly added lots of new provisions and loopholes to it. it's like imagine you have the same refrigerator for the last 27 years. you haven't cleaned it in all of that time. but you keep putting food in there. and now the thing smells so bad you don't even want to touch it. that is america's current tax code. an old refrigerator full of rotten food. now, over the years, corporations and other special interests have made a lot of money from this broken refrigerator, exploiting features from the interest deduction that allows hedge fund managers the pay only 20% on their earnings to the drilling cost deduction that lets oil company write off the extra cost of business to the -- and this is true -- chicken poop credit. that's real. i'm serious. under section 45 of the tax code, you can get a tax break for burning chicken poop. which is clearly insane.
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you shouldn't be paid to burn chicken poop. you should do it for the love of chicken poop burning so if the tax code needs to be fixed and there's a bipartisan desire to fix it, why hasn't anyone done it in 27 years? >> the reason we're not seeing more meaningful tax reform is quite simply because all of the politicians are terrified to alienate the base that funds them. >> you're going to have to find someone who is willing basically to do political suicide. >> it's that third rail of the new york subway system. you grab and you're electrocuted jon is it just me or does politics seem to have a surplus of third rails, certainly way more than three. >> national security has become basically the third rail in american politics. >> the politics of gun regulation are a third rail. >> social security is the so-called third rail of american politics. >> medicare reform package and of course that's the third rail of politics. >> the true third rail of american politics: picking a favorite sports team from outside your state.
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>> john: it's like america's political system is built entirely out of third rails. it's why you can't urinate anywhere in the washington d.c. area without getting electrocuted. that's true. that's a fact. the problem is that every single part of the tax code is in there because someone wanted it to be. if you as a politician even considered taking one out, its backers will make you pay. so you've got to think twice before going up against big hedge funds, big oil or big chicken poop. they'll get you. and what's more it's probably not just their current jobs that lawmakers are trying to protect. it's also their much more lucrative future jobs. >> in 1974, only 3% of retiring members of congress became lobbyists. today that number is 42% from members of the house and 50% for senators.
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>> john: i never thought i would say this: but washington really had so much more integrity back in the watergate era. ( applause ) look, all i'm saying is nowadays our lawmakers are so chicken [bleep] you could get a tax break for setting them on fire. that's not the point. here's the crazy thing. they're not wrong to be scared. which is why the credit must go here to senators baucus and hatch who are currently trying to overhaul the tax code from scratch. they've come up with an ingenius plan to encourage their colleagues to do something approaching their jobs. >> leaders of the senate finance committee have promised their fellow lawmakers that any suggestions they make about what deductions and credits are preserved in tax reform will be kept secret for 50 years. >> john: that is the lamest time capsule ever. look at this. this is from 2013. we got a sleen a gomez cd.
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something called a snuggie and, oh, a 10-to-1 spending cuts deal. it's all retro. this is how paranoid the senators are with their suggestions for making the country better might leak out and thereby destroy their careers. the 50-year ballot of secrecy wasn't enough. their ideas and opinions will each get their own i.d. number and be stored on password protected ser servers and in locked safes. those locked safes will have a handle made of a deadly spider which, even if you're brave enough to touch it, it won't actually work. it speaks. it speaks to how broken the entire system is that this story is both completely ludicrous and completely logical. it's also had an amazing lack of coverage. we found three stories on it. one was the cnbc story that you saw earlier. fox mentioned it once in passing. the other was on cnn who, like a
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flirtatious cat, briefly brushed up against this story's leg. >> our ideas our elected officials float to fix the tax system. we should know about them, right? wrong. senators are top secret in the last 50 years so washington's ideas for how to collect and spend your money doesn't involve you. check out that story at cnn money dot-com >> john: don't throw it to the web. you had some actual news there. for more on this we go to aasif mandvi who is in d.c. so aasif... [ cheers and applause ] aasif, an emblematic story about a key issue with legislators too terrified to address it and reporters too incompetent to cover it. >> hold on, john. not incompetent. i don't think you realize how toxic tax reform is in washington. to go anywhere near it, you need some real and -- pardon my
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french -- cojones >> john: i'm pretty sure that's spanish. >> whatever. i am a reporter with two cojones. i'm going to talk about this issue no matter how dangerous it is in this town. i have in my hand here an actual list of powerful washington lobbyists hell bent on preventing tax reform. everyone from the chamber of... >> john: whoa, whoa, whoa, aasif, aasif. whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. keep very still. keep very still. i don't want to alarm you but it would appear that you are being laser-targeted. are you sure you want to talk about this? >> yes, of course. it's a huge story. you said it yourself. don't worry. these lasers are just here to intimidate me. i am on television. they're not going to do anything, okay. anyway, top of the list here is the chamber of... (gunshot) oh, [bleep]. >> john: [bleep]. you've been targeted. >> i'm fine, fine.
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john: no, you're not fine. i'm not pussying out and throwing it to the web like cnn. >> john: that's very brave. (mumbling) john: actually, you didn't get the list. just to correct you there. >> all right. (first on the list is the) gunshot). >> oh, [bleep]. oh, come on. >> john: that's wild. that dart took a while to get to you. >> took a while. that stings. >> john: are you okay? i'm fine, john. i'm fine. all right. now let me just check one thing. are you a sea horse? >> john: no, i'm not. i'm not a sea horse. >> then i'm not okay. john: aasif mandvi, everyone. we'll be right back.
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welcome back. now the trayvon mart up case
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shows that race remains a difficult subject. really? what's the big deal? sam bee and jessica williams filed this report. >> the president has called upon americans to have a frank and open discussion on race. >> there has been talk about, should we convene a conversation on race? >> there's just one problem. is country is afraid to talk about race. >> it is still very difficult to talk about race. >> people are petrified to talk about race. >> according to people on tv, it is terrifying to talk about race. so sam and i convened two panels, one from the black community and one from the white community to show that it's really not that difficult at all. >> oh, i'm sorry. i'm in the wrong panel. no? oh, good. see how easy. >> the president says that he wants us to talk about race. so let's talk about race. you go first. >> it would be great if you started off. >> i don't think it would be great at all.
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>> if you're scared, say you're scared. >> (laughing nervously) no, i'm not at all. i'm incredibly comfortable. incredibly comfortable place for me to be. fortunately jessica's panel jumped right in. >> how far do you guys think we are as a society from eliminating racism on a scale of 0% to 100%. >> i'd say 50%. wow, 50%. racism is already half nonexistent. as long as everyone sees it that way. how far are we toward eliminating racism? >> 15%. a good 50%. 7%. heavens. that's just for obama. he gets 7%. >> we have a black president. i'll say 75. >> negative 20. apparently the state of race relations in this country is somewhere between this -- ♪ i've heard it said -- and this. all right. let's talk about race in america. >> talk about it too much. you think race is talked
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about too much. >> it is. the fact that we keep talking about the problem exacerbates the problem. >> perfect. let's not talk about race at all. >> the black people talk about race all the time. it's something we have to deal with all the time. >> white privilege affects every aspect of your life. >> my white privilege? it's part of your identity. it's at the intersection of a lot of different things. >> part of the privilege of being white is you don't have to feel uncomfortable just existing and thinking a police officer is going to profile you for what you look like. >> hot in here. this is not necessarily just a black issue. >> you see latinos and arabs being persecuted because of the color of their skin. >> if the name was rasawn williams they would lock this. .. >> this is called... a condition that causes me to sweat when i think things are going great. >> it is a tiny bit hard to have this conversation. >> why bring it up if if it's not a problem with you? >> has race affected your ability to get jobs.
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>> i've never been interviewed by a black person. this is the first time. maybe black people just aren't interested in my job. they should be because i work in fashion. >> oh, mid god. so maybe not everyone is sensitive to race issues but at least we're all equal in the eyes of the law. >> in new york, there is a policy called stop-and-frisk. you're stopped and searched. this happens every day. >> have you been stopped? definitely. have you been stopped? snd. yep. have you been stopped? no. a random stamp of five black people, four of you have been stopped and frisked. but not you. >> right. but i just moved here. >> have you ever been stopped and frisked? >> no. yes. so you have been stopped and frisked. >> at the airport. see, it's not that the conversation is is so difficult. it's just that it's going to )p k
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>> welcome bang. our guest tonight that you know from the hunger games he will also be in a upcoming movie in that series. his latest movie is is called "paranoia." >> why do you keep pacing so much? you look nervous. >> where are you?
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let me explain to you how this is going to work. >> we hit one of your friends first. >> or maybe the girl. if you even touch her... then get us what we need. john: please welcome liam hemsworth. [ cheers and applause ] >> john: let's sit down
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together. like a dog before they sit. so many people who come on this show saying these chairs are like dogs. >> you have to do a couple of 360s before you figure it out >> john: is that how you make a dog sit? just spin around a few times. >> that's what my dog does. he does 360s like this. we went there. >> john: lovely to meet you, liam. >> yeah. john: what is it like hearing that sound from women and men and knowing that it's not sarcastic? >> it's very flattering. it's nice. and then i completely let everyone down by doing 360s on my chair. >> john: do the 360 dog bit. then we'll just have a conversation from there. we'll pin the conversation around the 60 dog joke.
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paranoia is the movie about corporate espionage. seems like there's loads more action movies and thrillers around white collar crime. do you think we've accepted that is where the real money is now? jewelry hives seem like a thing of the past. it's white collar crime. >> very sneaky these days. that's what was very interesting to me is the whole world of corporate espionage. i thought it was only in movies before i read this script. i didn't think it was actually real. then i realized that huge car companies are losing billions of dollars to corporate espionage. and a lot of other companies >> john: what else i liked about this movie is the good, old-fashioned british villain. it's been a while. we lost that role. we had the bp oil spill. i thought that might give alan rickman a few calls. >> he's a scary little man, gary
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is. >> john: i guess because it's a big amount of scariness for a tiny british man. >> it is. it's so much scariness to come out of just a little guy. >> john: it might not be that he's little. it might be that you're a large australian man. we're all little to you. i was in australia earlier this year. it is a magnificent country. >> thank you. john: you're welcome. ( applause ) >> john: you're from melbourne. i'm from, yeah, i grew up a couple hours outside of melbourne on a little island >> john: we went to sydney. it was really great. really loved it. people all around were saying if you like it here, you should go to melbourne. it's really laid back there. more laid back than this? are they permanently tranquilized? >> i think 99% of it is that they're drunk most of the time. everything is just fun >> john: that is true. the legal drinking age is
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8-and-a-half, isn't it? >> yeah, i was born into a pub. john: we also went to see an aussie rules game for the first time. have you ever played that? >> i grew up playing that. my dad actually, he played aussie rules, you know, his whole upbringing. one of his first experiences, meeting mum's parents, was they came and watched him play a football game. at the time he had a large beard and a pony tail. he was in a biker gang at the time. and he wasn't exactly what your parents-in-law would want. and it was about five minutes into the game. another player came up. and grabbed my dad by the pony tail. and not what you do to someone with a pony tail, especially my dad. and he turned around and knocked him out. that was the first time that my parents had met my dad.
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he's a really nice guy. he's worked for child protection. he's not an aggressive person. >> john: why would you say that? i wasn't a child. i don't want to make out my dad... he's in a biker gang. it wasn't like hell's angels or something. >> john: your dad is a child-punching psychopath. that is what you came here to point out. thank you so much for coming here. "paranoia" will be in theaters on august 16. liam hemsworth, ladies and gentlemen. [ cheers and applause ]
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>> john: that's our show. join us tomorrow night. here it is your moment of zen. >> there are many other states that embrace those conservative values, the approach that we've taken over the years. i'm in one today in